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Okay, so for all you people out there...here is a funny story. So my husband and I had an arguement. Yea we were yelling but we had calmed the situation down. Well apparently when my husband left the house to cool off, the neighbors thought he had killed me or something because they couldn't hear me anymore. Well that was because I had stopped yelling. Well the stupid neighbors called the MPs (military police). My husband and I both got arrested. Next thing I know I am being charged with "assault by beating, striking, or wounding". My husband was also charged with who knows what. But the next day the charges were dropped on my husband. Come to find out my husband has been asking them to drop the charges on me. But apparently, since my husband never wanted charges pressed in the first place, the MPs are pressing the charges. Or should I say one over-zealous MP is pressing charges. How did I supposedly assault my husband? I hit him with a pillow in the arm a few times. Yep a pillow. No there wasn't anything in the pillow. Just the normal foam stuff that comes in a pillow. And on top of that, the MP that arrested me, who wasn't going to charge me and didn't want to charge me, told me to beat my husband with a phonebook because it wouldn't leave any marks. The pillow didn't leave any marks either. My husband's arm wasn't even red.

So for all you out there, no more pillow fights. It is considered assault!


So on Sunday, I was feeling a bit sick in the morning. It wore off and I went to Rikk's for a photo shoot. I felt great while I was at Rikk's. About 2 hours after I got done at Rikk's, my stomach started hurting horrible again. About 10:15 pm, I couldn't stand it anymore. Michael drove me to the hospital. Thank God I knew Rachel, who is a nurse there. I was in so much pain it hurt to stand up or walk. Rachel got me in really quick. After being inside for about 15 minutes, Rachel needed to take some bloodwork. And before I know it, the needle is in my arm and there is blood running out from where the needle was. I get hooked up to an iv, which is the first time I have ever had an iv, and then in comes Rachel asking if I was allergic to morphine. Of course I have never had morphine. I only got a really small dose of morphine, but it was straight into the blood stream so I was expecting the pain to go away in about 15 minutes. The only thing I started to feel was sleepy. It took about an hour and a half for most of the pain to go away and only about three hours after I got the morphine, it was wearing off. So by the time they released me from the hospital with two new medications, I was right back where I started. In horrible pain.

But at least I know that everything was caused by the medication the doctor prescribed to me.


So I used to have my lifeguarding certification...back in '02 and I was thinking about taking the classes again to get recertified. So after having a long talk with my mother I am taking the classes this week and next week. Then I will be a certified lifeguard...and I will have a job. Classes start today so I am hoping that I don't feel sick at all later since it's only been a day since my trip to the hospital.


Lately I haven't been having my period. The doctors' have been trying to jumpstart my periods. They gave me some medicine which ended up getting me sick. Last night I was in so much pain that Michael took me to the hospital. One of the nurses there happens to be a friend, so I got in really quickly. Next thing I know the nurse was putting a needle in my arm and blood was running out from where the needle was...I was a bleeder. Next thing I know I am hooked up to an IV and Rachel is bringing in morphine and putting it in with my IV drip. It took about 2 hours for the morphine to actually make the pain go away completely. Then of course I got some other drug put in my IV to take away my nausea. And of course they let Michael and I go right as the morphine was wearing off. So I get home and I am horrible pain yet again. I woke up about three different times thoughout the night in excruitating pain. And then I woke up this morning and got my period. So I am going through way too much this week. Hopefully I will be fine tomorrow because I have a class tomorrow.


you ever feel like your world is spiralling downwards? that you can't get out and you can't try to swim at all? that you are stuck? paralyzed? one thing after another keeps crashing down. one after another things go wrong.and you sit and think eventually there has to be a bottom to this well of darkness and despair. and just hopefully on your way down, there is a stone sticking out of the wall or a branch or some weeds, just something to grab ahold of so you can catch your breath. you know there are other people on their way up. you just need to know how they are doing it. who knows?

and for those of you who think it is so easy, it is because you haven't ever climbed out. you haven't ever fallen. it is hard to get back up sometimes. sometimes you start climbing back up and then something pulls you right back down. sometimes certain things aren't your fault, they just happen.

boring past few days...

So these last few days have been very uneventful. Except that some stupid mother fucker decided to drag my name into some bullshit. Yea. I was sooooo pissed when I heard from Michael that someone (who we dont know yet) drug my name into some really bad stuff with Michael. So yea. We dont know who did it and I dont even know all the details, but they said I called up Connie, one of the other wives. But I hate Connie, I think she is a bitch. She treats everyone like dirt and is rude all the time. She cheats on her husband on a regular basis, and the only reason he won't divorce her is because they have kids. But yea.

On another note, I got a few letters from Michael. Which was really awesome! I love getting letters from him, though they are far and inbetween. I miss him so much. But he gets to call a lot when he is not on the road. I love him sooo much. This whole thing sucks but yeah, Im getting through it.

I talked to my ex tonight. And for those of you who have known me for any good length of time you know my ex, Chad. He finally, finally admitted that he did some things wrong. Finally! Never once during our relationship did he ever admit that he did anything wrong. Tonight he actually said that he did and that he always tried to push my buttons. Which he tried to do tonight. I am sooooo grateful that Michael does not try to purposefully push my buttons. Michael rarely even does push my buttons. But Chad was like, "I'm so proud of you. You got your life on track." blah blah blah. But yea. The more I talked to him, the more I realized how much I love Michael and how grateful I am that I married Michael. I am actually even more gratefully that Chad and I broke up because now I have Michael. Even though the pain was immense when Chad and I broke up, there was a bigger and better plan for me.

Tomorrow...well actually today, I get to go swim in a freezing cold pool...and then go to work...and then come home and be bored. Hopefully Michael will call either later on this morning or later tonight. I wanna hear his voice again.



I'm so so very stupid. I like bombed my test in mils. I mean I passed but it was so horrible that I might as well have bombed it. Just another thing to add onto my list of things that have gone wrong within the last 24 hours. I seriously am getting more and more depressed! And frickin, Mike called this morning and I swear! I dont think he understands how badly things are going wrong. He doesnt know about this test yet either. I dont know. He seems to be getting a bit relaxed over there in Iraq. It seems like he has forgotten that it is still technically a war zone. I worry about him.

And now it seems like nothing is going right.


simple things...

Sometimes it is the simple things in life that make me happy. This weekend I am going to be doing DNC for the ROTC at the UofL homecoming game. DNC=Drills and Ceremonies. I walk out onto the field with a sharp saber and then present the sabers (create the arch with the sabers). Yea! I am excited. It is the homecoming game and I am gonna be in it. I am very excited about this and then also my parents-in-law called me. They are awesome. I am really really glad that they are my parents-in-law. They are really nice and very very cool. Other than that I paid my electric bill. So I dont have to worry bout that anymore. And soon, very soon, I will be getting BAH. I get paid next Thursday from work and by the week after that I should have another money order from Michael and then finally, last but not least the day after I get BAH I also get paid again. Yea...So November 1st I will be rolling in the money...lots of bills to pay and what not though.

But I wish Michael was here to see me at the game. I wish s badly he as here. And he is upset that he is going to miss it. So both his parents and my dad is going to see if they can tape it for him. And maybe next year he will be in school with me. Which would be totally awesome! He can help me with my history.

More later...I have to take out the trash...hehe...the bad thing about living alone right now...But when Michael gets back I won't have to worry about it.


The good, the bad, and the boring.

Why am I the one who feels bad for things I have no control over? I want to be able to take care of the problem. But I can't control it. There is nothing for me to do. NOT a damn thing that I can do to change the situation. It sucks to feel like I am to blame. I'm just over sensitive right now I guess, with Michael being gone.

On top of that I am trying to write up my cheat sheet for mils. (yes we are allowed to have one cheat sheet) But that is getting annoying. And I have to finish writing my paper on cervical cancer. I got about a page and a half done. Only half-way through it.

But on the up side of things, Michael and I were talking today. When he gets back he will probably stay with me in my apartment until the lease is up and then we can get a house together. He would rather get our own house that we can buy, so I can decorate it all. Which will be tons of fun. And he is going to try to go to UofL for a semester next year. Which would be really good.


bored and tired...

I am working on my paper for my First Aid and Safety class. Class was cancelled last week so instead we have to write a three page paper. I chose to do mine on cervical cancer. I am tired and bored. I only have like half a page done. This is gonna be hard. And I really really hate writing papers like this. I just needed a bitch break...you know.